Okay, this sucks

Okay, I don't know who has a deal with the man upstairs but can you have him show me a little love from here on out! Yesterday I found out that the family I'm working for has decided to go back to the whole daycare thing. Now I'm searching for a job really really hard and very very quickly. I really am disappointed since I do love the kids and the parents so much. It's hard to believe how attached you can get so quickly. So if you ever wondered how I manage to get myself into these messes, I can honestly say I have no clue!

At least it doesn't look completely bleak! I'm toying with the at home daycare thing again. After looking at it, I might possibly have three neices and a nephew that I would watch and that wouldn't be so bad. I wouldn't need a lot more kids on, maybe one more and that would be more than enough to make ends meet. I just wish Nick and I were in a better place that it would work better in. Guess I gotta make due with what I'm provided with! Hopefully we can still have the opportunity to purchase a different home in the next year. We'll see, never know how things will turn out.

For those of you wondering, I am doing better. I'm still really sleepy but I'm getting better every day. I go back to the doctor next week to talk about what is going on and what the next steps are. Nick and I really are excited to start a family and want to know if it's even an option. Emotionally I don't know if I can continue to go through the agony of having another miscarriage. Unfortunately it doesn't sound like they can do much until they know that it's a recurrant thing for sure. Like it isn't enough torture being a woman, let's throw in raging hormones and the biggest emotional roller coaster just to watch it all crash down again! Thanks a lot!

Oh, and for the side jobs, they are going alright. I am still tinkering with Mary Kay. Just when I think I have the resources to start picking up again is when something big, like losing a job, sets in and I'm pushed back about five steps. I have a big open house this weekend and I'm really excited about that. Hopefully I can get a lot of business from that although I'm no where near ready for it. I haven't even opened my product to see what I have. I should have ordered product but there hasn't been any time and very little money to get it going. Hopefully the chocolate business is starting to pick up. We seem to be having some technical difficulties but the orders keep coming in. I just sent out three orders earlier today, but haven't seen any new orders come in for the rest of the day. I'm really crossing my fingers that it all works out in the end! I am so excited for this project. Check us out when you have a moment. We are still updating and working on changing things around but here's the address www.soufflon.com.

Well I better run and work on figuring out this life I've been dealt!

Life sucks, Part II

Okay, so I'm really getting tired of life just sucking. Nick and I finally felt like we were in a good place and things start to shift for the worse again.

I gave Nick a very special gift for his birthday, I told him he was going to be a daddy. Last night my body changed it's mind though and so now we are so disappointed. We want so badly to have children and after the last miscarriage I thought we would be safe from another. Guess life just doesn't work that way unfortunately.

I'm trying to forget it and move on as quickly as possible. I have started with the holiday decorations and am hoping to get some baking done on Friday! I'm so looking forward to it. It sounds like I'm going to have a ton of kids that want to come help me too! It makes baking even more fun when you get to share it!

Well I suppose I better cut this one short today so I can go get some rest!

Can I just get back to normal?

LOL! Now that's a joke! I'm not even sure what normal is. Just when I think I'm back to a calm existence I realize that I have about five million things to do for something else.

The good news is my job has calmed down a lot. The kids are settled into their new home and Beau is a beautiful baby that doesn't fuss a lot. Nick and I went over there for dinner on Friday night and had a blast. Beth and Brad are great people and I love working for them!

Well the rest of my stuff has been on a little bit of a stand still since I've been working so hard with the boys and I'm so tired by the time I get home. My Mary Kay business has been doing pretty well and I'm looking forward to my open house this year on the first of December. I have everything planned and I am hoping to get all my stuff ready for it way in advance this time. I have the flyers going out early this week so I should be in good shape. The chocolate business is starting off here soon. Tewfic, my partner in chocolate crime, is finishing up the website right now and we'll be ready to rock and roll. Let me know if you ever want a sample and I can get you a few to try! Here's the website so you can check it out www.soufflon.com. They might seem a bit expensive but they are really, really good. Plus you are helping a good cause, ME! LOL!

The house is kinda at a stand still on home projects until probably after the holidays. It seems like all your energy gets sucked up so easily this time of year. I started checking out my holiday address list for Christmas cards. I'll have them done for Thanksgiving so I can get them out by the first of December. I truly love the holidays though. I'm looking forward to putting up the decorations and baking Christmas cookies, especially with the new stove. I'm going to try making a few new treats this year and be sharing as much as I can!

Well I suppose I better get back to money-making work. You know, since it's Sunday morning and I should be resting. Especially since we came home late and I didn't get to bed until 2AM, but that's fine. Guess it means I have to take a nap today! YAY!

Happy One Year Anniversary

So Nick and I made it to the one year mark in our house! I don't know whether to celebrate or scream sometimes. It's actually started to be a count down. One more year and we can move again. LOL! I do love this house dearly now, but it wasn't what I wanted at all when we started out. And those things that I didn't love about it then are the same things I don't love about it now. I've started a checklist of things that I really want in a home and hopefully this time Nick and I can actually talk about it rather than taking what we think we can get. It's still a ways off so I'm trying not to think about it a lot yet.

I finally got through the hard part of my job. The Richardson family is now in their new house and we can start making life for the boys normal again. Brady and Bennett have been over here at the house a few times this week since we need to get out of the way and they love it here. I've been so busy trying to wear them out that I've succeeded in wearing myself out as well. And yet I'm up on a Saturday morning at 6:30AM instead of resting in bed. At least writing is relaxing for me. It's not like I'm up trying to do a marathon!

Well I suppose I should go and actually start my day. I hope all is well with everyone out there!