Sorry it's been awhile...

I have been trying very hard to keep getting myself together. It seems like a never ending task. All I want to do is crawl into bed and sleep for days!

Okay well, I haven't been sleeping for days so here's what's been going on. Been working on trying to find out what I want to do with the rest of my life. I hate that there are so many things that make the decision so hard. My favorite question, "What if", is becoming a big pain in the you-know-what!

The writing has temporarily stopped again since things have picked up at Highland Manor again. I'm trying to get my schedule all worked out for it since things get all messed up pretty quickly when you have others dictating your schedule. But I closed on two homes for April and looks like possibly at least three at this point for May. I can handle waiting a little bit on writing if I'm not going to be broke all the time!

Reading is going great! I finished a book on Mary Queen of Scots, but already forgot the auther, but was really good. Read The Amulet of Samarkand by Jonathan Stroud and that was okay. A little harder to read but I'm continuing on with the series to see how things proceed. Started The golem's eye which is the next in the trilogy. I also finished 19 Minutes which was absolutely awesome. Not the all-time favorite, but for a murder suspense book, it was pretty good. Unlike The Innocent Man by John Grisham which I didn't care for, but it's not my kind of book in the first place. I'm also reading Stupid White Men by Michael Moore. I do think that Michael Moore is a little extreme, but it's hilarious what he says.

Well I suppose I better go. I know we are supposed to have rain showers today but I better make sure that the flowers are ready for the so they can actually sprout! I will try to be better about my blog again and not keep the postings so far and few between!

Too busy? Too stressed? Or just too lazy?

Well I'm hoping that the last item is not the case, but the writing has gone terribly of course. I have written less than five pages this week. I wish it was at least 50, but I can't seem to get back on track. It's almost like I can't find that voice that started me out. I did get some writing done last night while babysitting, but not much. So here I am on a Saturday night, almost Sunday morning, thinking that maybe my blog is the perfect way to start off writing again. Maybe a few lines in my journal. Or maybe not. I can always do that tomorrow. And then there are all those little things in the back of my head, like I could quick dust and vacuum the house. I got half of it dusted tonight before watching a movie, but I still have the other half and the vacuuming to do. But I also know that unless I start writing I won't do it tonight and there just won't be much time to tomorrow. I wish that there was some way to be able to live this dual life more harmoniously. I somehow wish that I knew how to better separate this lives and yet let them live together better.

Guess I better get writing. I have some inspiring music on and am starting to get sleepy so it's the best time to get dreaming!

Life is never dull...

Well we had a great time for Grandpa Storkson's birthday yesterday! Aunt Connie came up from Georgia to surprise him and it was a wonderful visit. I really miss her and her family and it's hard to know they are so far away. I've talked a lot lately about the importance of family and how I don't think I could ever live so far away. No offense guys, but sometimes I really wished we lived far, far away. But I just can't imagine it completely. I know that they are doing what is best for them and their family and that is the most important thing.

It's been really hard lately with all the stuff going on around here and last night I again realized how much I love my family. I spent all afternoon and night with them and I really didn't feel like leaving. It was the first time in awhile where I felt like I belonged again. That might sound really sad, but I'm not meaning it too. It just shows that I have been so wrapped up in keeping up with everything and making sure life goes right that I almost forgot that I do have people I can really trust and that will love me no matter what!

Free kitty to anyone who wants her!

Well she finally did it! Princess Kiki knocked another plant down. I figured that the tippy table and the large planter would prevent her from jumping up on it, but no, she likes a challenge. Now my corner in the entryway is bare. Just an empty table for her to jump on and the plant is up high so it's hitting the ceiling. I swear we need to lock that girl up and put her on meds. I'm actually thinking of giving her catnip to help her calm down. That used to help for Kermie when he would get all wound up. Although I don't think that he was ever as wound up as her.

If I didn't have bad luck

It's starting to become a joke. And that's a scary thing. Imagine your life having the motto "if I didn't have bad luck, I'd have no luck at all." Now I know that sounds really crazy and everyone's life gets better, it can't go down the tubes all the time. I swear there are few things that have really gone my way lately. I think the house is the biggest, but everything else seems to be falling apart. I am saying this with a smile on my face so at least I haven't given up hope for something to go my way.

Today is a big day. D-day. Decision day. Am I on the right track and do I just need to be patient? Should I change my life completely? So many things to weigh and consider. I know that Nick wishes this day would have come about a year ago. Good thing is I do know a lot more about myself and what I want. In fact I think that I've learned, or rather realized, more about myself in the last four months than I have in the last four years. I really thought at the beginning of March I was definitely on the right track, it's just that my life is littered with bad luck. I do the work, I try really hard and then everything falls apart.

The writing has improved again though. I have actually started to make considerable additions to it. I haven't wrote as much as I did that first week, but like 56 pages is tough to beat. And it's gotten busy, but I promise myself that I will try to at least look at it everyday and it's always with me no matter where I go. Speaking of which I better get cracking!

I hate the weather

Okay, how does this work? I'm here at work looking out the window at the beautiful day. All I want to do is go home and work on my flower garden. I want to be outside today and enjoy it. Maybe read and write. Sit on the porch. Why couldn't this have happened yesterday? And it's not supposed to be nice next weekend. Of course I get out of work early on Friday and now I will be stuck inside instead of enjoying the new flowers.

Okay, I suppose I better get back to work. Just had to gripe about how unfair things are going right now! But then again, how is that any different than how things usually go!

Blue Day

I hate days like this. The weather is supposed to cooperate. It's my only day off. And it ends up being crappy out. It's so depressing. I just wish that it could have been nice for an hour or so. Just let me get outdoors and be productive. I was definitely productive indoors today. One of those days where you wake up and can clean the whole house from top to bottom in a few hours and ready to tackle the next project.

Yesterday Jackson and I found flowers planted next to the garage. I'm thinking that they weren't planted there on purpose since they are in a really silly spot. But I'm looking forward to transplanting them to a better spot. I love gardening. I do really love to be outdoors, but I want to make things look pretty. Especially our really white house. I am looking forward to a little color this spring. The grass is really green and I've pruned the front crabapple tree so it should look great this spring. I can't wait for it to bloom. I want things to start looking nice and for the weather to just be nice from now on. I know I'm asking a lot but I need it.

This week Chris comes from corporate to see us for the first time in a very long time. I'm a little nervous as I always get when someone comes. I guess it's my self doubt tying me in knots. If only I could not be so darn nervous. Maybe I'm just really worried about being let go again. I know that there have been a lot of changes within the organization and I came close to losing my job once due to job cuts. Thank god for Chris. He made sure that they kept my job! I really appreciate it. Guess I just wish that I was having better luck though. I don't think I've ever gone through such a bad string of luck with clients. No closings this month and none in February. This is crazy. I have never been so busy and not had any closings in a long time. There is no excuse for it. I'm really worried about the market. I've been very lucky to not have to worry about the market. We've always had a tight niche and been very successful. But the market just seems to be dropping really rapidly. Who knows what this means.

So, the writer in me is having a hard time again. The editor in me is having a lot of fun. I figured out how to use all the comment/markup functions in Word and have been just tearing my work apart. The comments have been really helpful. I'm hoping that I can finish at least the prologue in it's entirety this week. I worked on the big hole in my story over the weekend and at least have a better direction of where it should be. I like the ending, but of course I do, but I knew that there needed to be more middle. I knew I suddenly was near the end and at 60 pages that wasn't good. No more writing sprees lately, but I'm hoping I can change that as well. At least I am writing a little more each day and starting to ask questions. Boy do I love to ask questions. I just wish I had more answers. The good news is that I might actually be able to answer these. They are slowly forming and I will have one hell of a good time telling this story. It's actually kinda funny. I was thinking about how I'd love for someone to read so that they could ask me questions about it as well, but then after looking at it no one could ever understand it. I have a great storyline, but it's just an outline at this point. High points with no base. It's getting there though!

Well I suppose I better get back to writing and editting. I have a few more hours of my weekend left. I better enjoy them while I can!

Just finished...

I just finished My Life by Bill Clinton on audiobook. Wow! I've never really been into politics which is kinda funny cause at one time I was really interested in being a lawyer, but this book was really good. I forgot how much I liked Bill Clinton despite all the personal problems he went through while in office. I'm not much for discussing my personal political values so I'm going to stop there and suggest you read it.

Life has been pretty uneventful this week. I got the flu, the icky, sicky flu and was in bed for two days. Now I'm getting back to life and figuring out what I missed. I definitely have missed out on working on my book. You would think with two days at home I would have done a ton with it. But my main concern was how close the bathroom was. When your tummy is reminding you that it can control your life you can't think about the next chapter or where you want your characters to go. Although I did get through some of my research. Plus it gave me a good starting point of where I need to be going.

Mindmapping! This is the best thing in the world. I used to do these in school all the time and I forgot how awesome they are. The one thing I could concentrate on where the ideas that were floating around that needed to be put down. So I got out a blank sheet of paper, thank god I've been keeping all those half used sheets of paper, and started writing down ideas in their little bubbles. Then came in the fun part of drawing all the lines on how everything relates. I think I worked through the problems I was having with my book and how to resolve it. So now that I'm feeling better I really should be working on my book rather than reading and blogging! I'll get there, just need a little time to warm up and get the creative juices flowing. I have a whole hour to devote to writing this morning and I plan on using it!

Anyone interested...

Okay, now I set it up that anyone can reply to posts without having a blogger account so I need some input. I am wondering if anyone would be interested in an online book club or writer's workshop. I'd rather have them online since I seem to get busier and busier each day. Then we can post and reply whenever fits everyone's schedule. Let me know what you think and if you'd be interested.

weather....

I love the spring, especially when it acts like summer! I have found some great spots in and outside the house to enjoy the weather. Last night I sat on the front porch to read. It was heaven. The only thing that would have made it better is if we had a swing out there! I love swinging or rocking!

Oh, and the second is our bedroom. I hate the futon in there, but it's been great to have the patio door open, sit and just enjoy the weather! I can do so much more sitting here with my books and computer. But either are great!

This weather has been great to think and reorganize for the book. I think I got my problem worked out and from here I can actually get back to writing! Now if I could only find a few more hours in the day to be able to write!

another one bites the dust

So the reading quest continues....

I finished Danielle Steel's Johnny Angel. It wasn't that bad and definitely a real quick read. I really need to quit reading books that talk about death. At least this one wasn't very dark. This is what I wish The Lovely Bones would have been more like. The Lovely Bones was way to lighthearted for the murder that took place. Johnny Angel on the other hand was sad, but relieving too. There wasn't any bad guys and troubling thoughts running through my head. It was just someone/something trying to make the world a better place.

So now I'm trying to finish I'd Rather be Writing and I get to continue with Stupid White Men by Michael Moore. It's been so nice that I've been able to go out and read on the front porch. It is a great way to start the day. But it's getting late and I better get ready to go to sleep. I've had a short weekend and tomorrow I return to work.

whatever will happen now??

I am in one of those phases again where I know that something big is going to happen soon. Maybe it's everything with work or just life in general, but something is definitely going on and I can feel it.

Well the reading thing is going very well lately. I just finished listening to The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time by Mark Haddon. I think that I'm going to have to actually read it. It actually kind of scared me on how I could relate to the autistic child that was the narrator. I'm scared to admit that I think like he does a lot of the time. Okay, so I understand I can talk to strangers, and that I can actually use a public restroom instead of wetting myself. Sorry, gotta read the book to understand. Oh, and I just finished, I mean minutes ago, The Thirteenth Tale. Now that was a good book. It is definitely one I will have to buy and read again. I need it in my library to remind me that it's good that books don't turn out how you expect them to and something they really shouldn't. After all, is it really fun to read about something and figure it all out before the end. As usual I tried to guess the ending and I couldn't have been more further from the truth. Not only was I wrong about the ending but I was wrong about the middle! Oh, I have so much to learn. The good thing is it makes me think that writing is the best medicine for me. I just wish that one story would come out instead of my brain coming up with five million.

And on to writing..... Blah!!!! LOL! I wish that I could say I am writing like a fool and it's going great but it isn't. I think that I finally realized where I need to expand my story and get it back on track. In fact I think that I'm probably done with it, or at least the skeleton of it. I can feel that I'm missing something though. The last two weeks I have been just thinking about it in my head. I've been trying to get it out of my head so it can breathe on its own and let me know when it's figured itself out, but unfortunately my brain doesn't work that way. But I think that is what the big itch I'm getting has to deal with, or at least partially. I'm sure that there are several things that will be worked out in the next few weeks. Lord knows that I have a life in need of a good fix!

Life will get worked out and tends to work better when I stop trying so damn hard! Guess it's back to the meditation state for me and maybe I'll find that moment of truth yet!

Just a little note

Okay, I'm having a ton of fun with the whole book thing so I promise that I will keep it up to date with what I'm reading and all that fun stuff! Gotta get my writing in one way or another. And this is great practice!

So what am I reading right now! Well for some strange reason I'm trying to read four books at once! Here's what's on my pile:

I'd Rather be Writing by Marcia Golub - this book is awesome about how writers have such a hard time staying on track and in the mood to write. I am totally relating to this right now. I want to write, but there are so many other things going on! LOL!

The Thirteenth Tale by Diane Setterfield - I have heard nothing but great things about this book, but I always pick it up when I'm half asleep already so I only get a few pages in at a time. I got it from the library so I need to finish it this week!

Stupid White Men by Michael Moore - this is our Book Club selection for May! I haven't gotten very far into it but Nick kept asking what was so funny. Seems I kept laughing out loud at everything in the book!

Johnny Angel by Danielle Steel - A resident gave me this book to read. I used to read a lot of Danielle Steel books but after reading the Lord of the Rings I gave up and started reading fantsy and sci-fi. Thought I'd give it a try though since she really liked it! Beside I know that her books are usually a quick read so I should be able to finish this book this week as well! Two books in one week, that'd be good!

Okay, and of course I have an audiobook going for the wonderful commute:
The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time by Mark Haddon - I'm starting it today on my drive so I'll let you know how it goes. This is our June Book Club selection. Wow am I getting ahead of myself! LOL!

Well that's it for now! Don't think I need to get anything else on board till I have the time to clear some of these off! I'll keep you posted!

March 2007 - What I've read so far

Well I figured it might be easier for everyone if I broke it down by month! I've really been on a reading mission!

So far so good, I can't remember everything I've read lately, but I do have a list here somewhere so I'll update it later. Here's the list so far:

The Memoirs of Cleopatra by Margaret George - I love her books. This one inspired me to write. Everyone hates Cleopatra because of her great history as being a seductress to keep control of Egypt. Margaret had a great way of writing to explain why she could have done what she did. You feel compassion for her and feel like you know her better than your best friend. I love a book where you can fell, see and smell what is going on in a book!

Marley and Me by John Grogan - I wrote about this book already, but it is a really good book.

Angels and Demons by Dan Brown - I wrote about this book already. I do think that I will probably try to read it again. I think that I was disappointed because I thought it was too mainstream. I love books that you don't quite know where you are going. This one was way too straight-forward. But it was still good, don't get me wrong!

Rip Van Winkle by Washington Irving - you should always travel back to your youth once and awhile. I loved children's stories and this is a great one. I promise someday I'll be sharing this with my kids!

The Little Guide to Your Well-Read Life by Steve Leveen - This focused a lot on getting reading in your life by any means possible. He focused a lot on listening to audiobooks since everyone spends a lot of time in the car. Now I always have a couple audiobooks ready to go for the commute.

The Innocent Man by John Grisham - I read this book for Book Club and I really didn't like it. There was too much repitition and guts. This is not a book I would normally read cause it makes me think about a lot of dark things. If you like murder/thriller books it might be up your alley, but I will warn you that it does have a lot of information in it. Not a quick read at all!

The Sun Also Rises by Ernest Hemminway - just finished on audiobook. It was good, very disappointed in the ending. Always looking for that happy ending or rather something that happens. It seemed like he just ran out of things to say. Still was good and I didn't turn it off and start listening to something else so it kept my attention. I just wish I could be a writer that could live in Paris and travel all over Europe when the notion took me!

The Lovely Bones by Alice Sebold - This book really bothered me. I thought it was good until suddenly I just got disturbed by the murderer. He just really bugged me. The scene where he's in his chair and playing with the bones just rubbed me the wrong way and I had to put the book down. I did end up going back to it and finishing it, but I think it was more out of having to for Book Club rather than because I wanted to!

The Odyssey by Homer - I loved this book! I love adventures so this was so up my alley!

A Grief Observed by CS Lewis - not a lot to say about this book, but it was good

On Writing by Stephen King - this was awesome! I might not read much of his fiction, but he has a great way of talking about the craft! Anyone who can talk about his drug habits and drop the f-bomb and make you laugh about it has a place on my book shelf!

I'm sure I'm missing some, but that's what I have for right now! Hope this helps everyone! Have fun reading!

Recommended Reading - Thanks for all your help!

Well it's been almost two months since I went on my quest for the great books to read. Everyone was very helpful so I thought I would share what everyone has shared with me! Sorry guys, I haven't gotten to all of yours, but there is so much to read out there I'm getting to them!

Recommended Reading:
Angels & Demons by Dan Brown - I did read this and did like it. Not sure that I liked it more than The Da Vinci Code, but I think that it was the concept. I was very interested in the historical figures in The Da Vinci Code.

The Godfather by Mario Puzo - There has to be something here or they wouldn't have made all the movies!

Anything by Piers Anthony - haven't gotten this far yet, but it's fantasy so I'm sure I'm going to love it!

Marley and Me by John Grogan - Read this book in a weekend! Great short read, especially for the summer. Watch out, if you have dear pets it's a little sad. I cried and cried!

Dear John by Nicholas Sparks - haven't read yet

The Husband by Dean Koontz - haven't read yet

Memoirs of a Geisha by Arthur Golden - okay this is a favorite. I have read it multiple times and think that the movie is beautiful.

Fall on Your Knees by Ann Marie MacDonald - haven't read yet

Running with Scissors by Augustan Boroughs - haven't read yet

Pillars of Earth by Ken Follet - haven't read yet

Gone for Good by Harlen Cogen - haven't read yet

Tell No One by Harlen Cogen - haven't read yet

At First Sight by Nicholas Sparks - haven't read yet

Three Weeks by Nicholas Sparks - haven't read yet

Fifth Horseman by James Patterson - haven't read yet, and this is fifth in a series so I might start the whole series before this one

Mary Mary by James Patterson - haven't read yet

Eugene Onegin by Aleksandr Sergeevich Pushkin - haven't read yet

Steppenwolf by Hermann Hesse - haven't read yet

The Thirteenth Tale by Diane Setterfield - just started reading, will keep you posted.

The Historian by Elizabeth Kostova - haven't read yet

Anything by Henry James - haven't read yet, but have The Wings of the Dove in my library to read thanks to wonderful Stephie!

Anything by Edith Wharton especially House of Mirth or The Buccaneers - listened to House of Mirth on audiobook and really did like it, love Ethan Frome too

The Iliad by Homer - haven't read yet

The Aenied by Virgil - haven't read yet

Jane Eyre by Charlotte Bronte - loved it in high school

Villette by Charlott Bronte - haven't read it yet

The Portrait of Dorian Grey by Oscar Wilde - haven't read it yet

Anything by Jane Austen especially Northanger Abbey and Persuasion - haven't read any yet, but love the movies based on her books: Emma, Pride and Prejudice, and Sense & Sensibility.

Possession by A. S. Byatt - haven't read yet

Map of Love by Ahdaf Soueif - haven't read yet

Arabian Nights aka: A Thousand and One Nights - haven't read yet

Mrs. Dalloway by Virginia Woolf - haven't read yet

Orlando by Virginia Woolf - haven't read yet

The Hours by Virginia Woolf - haven't read yet

Dracula by Brom Stoker - haven't read yet

Frankenstein by Mary Shelly - haven't read yet

Okay, well this is what every sent me I will give a separate blog to those I've been reading and what are my favorites!

Side project

Okay, I know that I'm sometimes a super private person. I don't let a lot of people know what is going on in my life, but then I like not having to answer a lot of people questions when things aren't going the correct way! But I have to get this out there! I just can't keep quiet about it at all! I have started writing a book! Yay! As you can tell, I'm very excited about it! Sometimes life isn't what you thought, but this feels very right. Unfortunately I'm stuck right now in it, but I know that I just need a little bit to think it all out.

So what's it about? Well there's a story behind it. I read Margaret George's The Memoirs of Cleopatra, by the way was fabulous! I love the way she writes. For someone who hates history, I've found that I really like reading about it. Well if it's fictional history based on true history! So I learned a lot about Cleopatra and Julius Caesar and their love affair. It seems that they had a son together. Well in Margaret's story Cleopatra miscarries a second child by Caesar. And here is where my "what if's" came in. I'm rewriting history and it's great. That's all I'm going to tell you because I'm not sure where it will end up at this point. Not happy with where it is right now so I'm thinking about going back a rewriting a bunch of it!

Okay, why am I doing something so crazy? Because I already write in my journal everyday and have tried to write daily for the last eight years. I've had a journal for the last 12 years. I love to write and I love to read. Seems like a natural fit to me. Do I want fame and fourtune? Of course, but I'm realistic. I know that it might not happen. But will it hurt me any? It will hurt me more to not try. There are more "what if's" if I don't try than if I do go through with it. And I have learned so much about myself and of course I'm finally learning all that history that I wasn't interested in high school. Wish they would have made it this interesting when I was in high school. I'm thinking that they really approached history the wrong way. I would have learned a lot more if it would have been presented through literature. Boy do I wish that schools would pay more attention to the way people learn. I'm a very visual learner, so no wonder why I liked math and literature. I see things very clearly. Okay, enough of all of this. I better get back to organizing. I plan on picking back up on the book and getting my research a little more organized. Heaven knows it works much better when I know where to find everything!

when it rains, it pours

What a difference a week can make! The busy season has begun at Highland Manor. I'm taking offers on homes like crazy. I think I might be setting records this year! At least I'm hoping so!

So what made this week so different? In one week I took four offers. I have another appointment on Monday for another offer. I have someone interested in my most expensive and least expensive homes. Well, truthfully, I have two someones interested in the least expensive home. But that's how it goes this time of year. Can I keep up? I'm not sure at this point! LOL! I have a stack of offers and leads I have to contact on Monday. Well actually I should be contacting them right now, but there was no way to do it on Friday or Saturday. I had six appointments for Saturday! Kinda crazy considering that I'm only supposed to be there for 3 hours. Six and a half hours later I was still trying to get out of work. I could have spent another couple hours going through everything. But I love it and I love being busy.

I plan on selling around 30 homes this year. I'm a little behind at only having one closing so far this year, but I plan on changing that this month. Guess that's pretty obvious with the amount of offers I'm taking right now. And I have a feeling that I might be able to go over that. The founders of Uniprop asked me to sell 48 homes this year. I think it might be a stretch but I might be able to do it. With this type of traffic coming in you never know what will happen. We might need to rethink only 10 new homes being brought in! I think I might be able to bring in at least 15 new homes this year. And the residents are super helpful. They give me great ideas and are really starting to refer people to Highland Manor! Boy does that help! We are going to have an awesome year!

What a time to be thinking...

It's so hard to believe how much things can change so quickly. I've been pouring my little heart out over this novel, my new baby. I can't believe how quickly it can come to shape. Research started less than a month ago and hundreds of books later I finally started writing. Last Saturday was the magical day when serious writing came out and it hasn't stopped since. My head hurts a little from all the concentration on the book, but it's well worth the headache. 20 pages later, I'm pretty impressed. But now comes the procrastination. My goal is only 4000 words tonight. That's only about 14 pages! And another 10 pages tomorrow. Can I do it? Yes, I can. As Bob the Builder would say. Man do I miss kids! But seriously, I somehow know that this is the right thing to be doing with my life. It's strange how the world works. I hated history in high school and now I'm writing a piece of historical fiction. The research is wonderful and it hilarious to see how much I have learned in this short period of time. I need to thank Margaret George, author of Memoirs of Cleopatra, for giving me the inspiration to say, "What if?"

Life in New Glarus is otherwise uneventful. We continue to wait for the snow to melt to start projects and for the commission checks to come in from work for me. Sales are still slow at Highland Manor, but I am expecting a great year as is my new boss! Hopefully the weather will start to get better so that it starts to pick up again.

Well I better get back to writing. Can't keep putting it off anymore!

A year later...

Well Stephie and I didn't do the triathlon. So much has changed in a year and thank goodness most of it has been good. There have been a lot of hard times but at least I understand myself so much better. There is always something underneath it all.

So this year I am working on continuing improvements to my life and figuring out who I really am. I've been journalling a ton and with each new entry I learn more and more about myself. I've been reading many different kinds of books and feel like they are helping me on my journey. In fact I just read, or rather listened to the audio book, that said that writing is the new religion. By journalling I'm in fact praying to an higher source of power for help. And these prayers have been helping.

In fact I've opened a completely new chapter in my life. I have decided to start writing a book. I am in heaven! I have started the research and found that I miss college all over again. The trips to the library and doing research on the web, they all make me feel like I could make a difference. Maybe not a big social or political one, and possibly not even make a mark, but I know that someone might understand where I'm coming from and where I want to be. I will continue to see things in a different way than many people and I hope that someday I will find more people that understand where I am coming from! So far I've been lucky enough to have two people in my life that really know me. More than I know myself sometimes. If I didn't have them to make me think more and push myself more than I normally would, I would be a big couch potato.

So on I go with the book research and hopefully by this time next year I'll be on my next book and have a date for the publishing of my first book. I'm crossing my fingers, but for some reason I don't feel that I really need to. I feel, for the first time, that I am really on the right path. That's saying something!

About damn time...

Okay so life hasn't been the kindest lately and challenges keep slapping me in the face every time I turn, but today I have seen the light!

I don't know if it's the combination of work/play/work/sleep/work/family that has been driving me batty, but I think I'm finally figuring it out. Stephie and I are participating in our first sprint triathlon at the end of March and then a longer one in June! I am so excited about the prospect of this little non-athlete becoming super athlete. I've never run in my life, well up until last year it was a little impossible to do any way. Last year I started biking. Actually it was so much fun because I got to share it with Haley. I would borrow Mary's bike and we would take our 3-5 mile bike rides and point out the doggies and sing songs along the way. Can't wait til it warms up to do it again! As for this swim, I'm a little scared! I have not really swam since junior high and that was about the time I learned I had asthma so that was pretty pathetic. Almost everyday I go to the gym and log my time in at the bike, treadmill, and that scary pool! Maybe not all at the same time, but I've been completing quite a few bricks so I know I can complete them in no time flat! Our first triathlon will be in March in Whitewater. This one I'm really excited about because I know that I can do the 5 mile bike and the 2 mile run shouldn't be so bad. But that 1/4 mile swim is making me shake. Today I struggled with 200 yards and I still have 300 yards to go. But I haven't given up. That pool is calling my name again and I plan on tackling another 200+ yards tonight.

And the reason for my sudden rush of adreneline? I have a buyer! I haven't had a real sale in almost 4 months. That's a long dry spell. And I sold our most expensive home! Yeah me! I'm so excited I think that I could almost run the full 2 miles right now! I'm hoping that this is the starting point of a good year! I know that I've needed to make changes, and I've slowly been evaluating myself and my goals. Things are starting to look up and I can't complain at all! Plus I have a birthday around the corner. I love my birthday so I have to have things under control by then!

I better sign off for now before I lose that rush!

It's finally here..

Since I've been forgetting to get everyone my Christmas list, here it is...

Digital Music Player/MP3 Player
The Magic Bullet (Blender)
Step Stool
Garmet Steamer
Trivial Pursuit Pop Culture 2nd Ed
Earagon by Christopher Paolini
Eldest by Christopher Paolini
Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince by JK Rowling
DVD's:
Cold Mountain
Finding Neverland
Star Wars III
Star Wars original trilogy
America's Sweethearts
Unfaithul
The Princess Diaries II
Someone Like You
Frosty the Snowman
A Charlie Brown Christmas
The Santa Clause
E.T.